leeds united – Around Hanwell and up the allotment

Brentford FC in the Premier League 2021/22– episode 11

May – It’s the final countdown!

Manchester United 3 Brentford 0 Monday 2 May

A measure of the power of the United brand is that the club isn’t mentioned by name on the tickets, nor on the programme cover. And of course, a visit to Old Trafford, like Anfield, was what we dreamt of on that glorious day at Wembley last year.

We made a May Bank Holiday weekend of it, staying in Salford, which has a much different feel to it than the City Centre where we stayed for the City game earlier in the season. We posed for pictures outside the Salford Lads Club, which is actually on Coronation Street. Surreal.

Old Trafford didn’t disappoint. It’s a lovely ground. There was a lot going on and a lot more Mancunian accents than we’d expected. Darkness fell as the 8pm kick-off approached and some United fans protested in the drizzle against the Glazer owners; a lot of green and yellow scarves. Inside, green and yellow flares and a mass walkout of fans planned for the second half.

73,482 spectators witnessed interim manager Ralf Rangnick’s last home game. Can’t have been easy for him. It was also Juan Mata’s last home game. Jesse Lingard didn’t even feature. All a bit subdued.

The programme was one of those big square ones, fact packed with lots of photos. It had a pretty good junior section, including a pull-out Legends of the North poster that some of us junior 60-year-olds folded into over-sized paper aeroplanes. Made a change from red and white balloons…

Cristiano Ronaldo was yet again the figure everyone loves to hate. Why does such a good player have to keep falling over whenever anyone gets within 10 feet of him? One missed free kick prompted a ‘You’re just a shit Sammy Saunders…’ which led to a medley of the old songs.

I could swear those goal posts are leaning backwards

United beat us 3–1 in the reverse fixture in January, but given our improvement since Eriksen joined, and United’s inconsistency, we were hopeful of a draw. Though Brentford tried hard we were outclassed. And we gave the ball away an awful lot. United’s first goal came after nine minutes, a class volley by Fernandes. To our delight, Ronaldo had a goal disallowed by VAR, though he did score a penalty on 61 minutes after going down following a Rico challenge. Hmmm. Ten minutes later Varane nailed it with a deflected shot.

We hardly noticed the protest walkout on 73 minutes. It just looked like the usual fair weathers leaving early to get to the car park. ‘That’s just embarrassing!’ we sang.

The final whistle went. We applauded Thomas and the boys, then filed out of the Theatre of Dreams, hopefully not for the last time. Meanwhile, the United fans seemed less than exuberant, even after this good performance.

Back to the hotel for some good old fashioned northern consolation. Meanwhile, the TV in the bar was showing an MUTV Ronaldo hagiography.

Brentford 3 Southampton 0 Saturday 7 May

Ralph Hasenhüttl’s Southampton have slipped up a few times since they thumped us 4–1 on that dark evening in January. By contrast, we’re a slicker, more confident outfit these days. The atmosphere in the Community Stadium was buzzing with expectation. As three o’clock approached we thought we could win this one.

We remember the passion of Southampton fans so maybe it was they who threw red flares/smoke bombs onto the pitch. Maybe it was us. I can’t remember now and I don’t mind them so much anyway. I even like the smell though I guess breathing smoke bomb isn’t good for you.

Why does the portal always make me chortle?

Southampton had more of the possession but we were really good. We were always in control and we made it count. Pontus and Wissa each scored within two minutes early in the first half and Ayer sealed it 10 minutes from time. Their star player Ward-Prowse didn’t get much of a look-in, and it was nice to see our own double-barrelled rising star, B-team youngster Nathan Young-Coombes, make his first team debut near the end.

Christian Eriksen – a player with ‘flare’

The chat around us was all Christian Eriksen – will he stay or will he go at the end of the season?

We had to scarper on the final whistle to get a train, so we missed the customary lap of appreciation. Though we certainly had appreciated Brentford’s magnificent performance. We are staying up!

Everton 2 Brentford 3 Sunday 15 May

So, ferry cross the Mersey. Bigger than I remember it…

We decided to make a weekend of it and got the train from Euston to Liverpool the day before the game. Hundreds of Liverpool fans were arriving for the FA Cup Final at Wembley against Chelsea, while we were on our way up to watch Liverpool’s local rivals. On the journey we both voted for Bryan Mbeumo as our Brentford player of the season. Who got your vote?

We checked in and walked up the old dock road through the waterfront hinterland. Dilapidation and renovation side by side. The scenery chimed with the state of Frank ‘the Magic Lamp’ Lampard’s Everton FC. They are in trouble. Either they, Leeds or Burnley will be going down with Norwich and Watford. And of course we beat them at home last November, though they did whop us in the Cup.

We had a pint outside the Bramley Moore pub while Liverpool were winning the FA Cup on the telly inside. Then we noticed we were right by the site of Everton’s proposed new stadium. Looks like a nice spot. But apparently, building it will mean the massive old dockyard/waterfront area loses its UNESCO World Heritage Site status.

Because of other fixture pile-ups and the requirements of TV companies, kick-off was moved to 4.30pm. Which meant that some fans couldn’t go. Consequently we were all credited with the cost of a future match. Which was nice.

A strong and determined Dixie Dean – one of the better footballing statues

Goodison Park is a lovely old ground, set back in time. None of that card-only payment nonsense for programmes here. We reckon it should be a UNESCO World Heritage Site in its own right. We were there early enough to see the Everton fans welcome their manager and players’ team coach. A right-old melée of fans young and old, milling around, willing their team to win. Singing their hearts out and waving blue smoke bombs around.

Everton reckon weeing on the portal brings good luck. We might need to try this next season…

Inside the ground, the atmosphere was big and lively, with plenty of old fashioned football songs. All that was missing was flat caps and football rattles. The players came out to a blasting of the old Z-Cars theme. Iconic time travel. It certainly felt like there were more than 38,819 people in there.

They had netting to protect them from Bees fans…

It’s also a curiosity of a ground. A giant net curtain separated us from the home fans to our left. And away players/coaching stuff have a different exit in the corner near the away fans, on the opposite side of the pitch to the dugout and home tunnel. I’m told this arrangement predates the pandemic. Not a bad thing, I suppose, as we got to see our heroes close up.

…it wasn’t enough to stop Bees players swarming.

It was an exciting game. Everton went ahead on 10 minutes. Shortly after, Pontus pulled an Everton player’s shirt in the penalty area but got away with it. Straight after, Branthwaite brought down Toney at the other end of the pitch and was sent off. Controversial decisions, but we weren’t complaining!

Brentford equalised on 37 minutes through an own goal but Everton went ahead again with a penalty bang on half time. We buried our heads in the programme for 15 minutes to try and put it out of mind. The programme is OK. A good section on Brentford but a bit stingy on the junior front.

More smoke bombs à go-go, as Everton smelt victory. But there was a double detonation of Brentford delight when Wissa and Henry scored on 62 and 64 minutes to put us 3–2 up. Unbelievable! Then to cap it all Rondon was sent off on 84 minutes for a reckless challenge on Rico. Rondon had only been on the pitch for four minutes, and it put Everton down to nine men.

We were in fine voice throughout but were still drowned out, such was the passion of Everton’s fans, at least for today. I’m told they’ve been a bit subdued most of the season. We played well, too.

Around the 80 minute mark, police filed into the ground to line the bottom of the stands. I started humming a reprise of the old Z-Cars theme.

In the aftermath of the game, results elsewhere mean Everton are likely to stay up despite losing. There were also reports that fireworks had been set off outside the Brentford players’ hotel at 3.40am the night before the game. But it didn’t stop us doing the double over them. Yes, Brentford –another double.

It was sad to hear that relatives of two Brentford players were subjected to racist abuse in the ground. I hope they caught those responsible.

Brentford 1 Leeds United 2 Sunday 22 May

All today’s games, the final ones of the season, kicked off at 4pm, with the Champions spot to be decided as well as the remaining relegation place. For Brentford, it’s a welcome spotlight of a different kind.

The photo doesn’t quite capture the lilac-ness of the Leeds away kit

Leeds are in trouble. For a while it seemed either they, Everton or Burnley would be going down with Norwich and Watford. But after Thursday night’s Great Everton Escape, it will be Burnley (at home to Newcastle) or Leeds (away to us) who join the already doomed. Leeds’ dreadful goal difference means they are in the greater peril. So, could Jesse Marsch, their new manager, inspire the team to one final effort? He was previously assistant to Man U interim Ralf Rangnick at RB Leipzig, so he should know a thing or two…

We’ve bought match day programmes for every single away game this season, and not one for a home game (we gave up on them years ago). So we treated ourselves to one for this, the last home game of the season. Mildly surprised to see it cost £4; i.e. 50p more than at other clubs. It’s pretty good though, with an interesting interview with Pontus, and a fascinating/funny top 10 events of the season by Nick Bruzon.

What I hadn’t realised, before reading this final one, was that the cover of every programme this season was illustrated by Dave Flanagan. A fellow fan had shown me his superb Eagle v Bees illustration for the Palace cover, but I didn’t know he was doing them all. You can check them out on Twitter: @daveflanagan

They can’t make out how to describe that kit. Lilac? Lavender? Shrinking violet?

Leeds started well. They obviously meant business. They thought they’d scored on 19 minutes, but VAR said no. In the second half it all went wrong for Brentford. Leeds scored a penalty on 56’. Thomas Frank then made a series of three substitutions. Then Ayer went off injured so we had to soldier on with 10 men. Sergi Canos scored a lovely goal on 78’ but got booked for taking his shirt off. Why do they do that? Two minutes later he got booked for a foul and was sent off. FFS! Leeds got their winner in stoppage time. Ironic that Brentford ended up down to nine men, just as Everton were when we played them last week. And it was disappointing to lose our last game of the season.

News reached the Leeds fans and then the players that Burnley had lost. Leeds had won. Leeds were staying up. The Leeds celebrations started with the manager, coaches and subs racing over to the away fans corner. It went on for a good while, slightly raining on our own parade, but fair play to them. One of their players even crawled from one penalty area to the other on his knees. As you do…

Eventually, the Brentford end of season celebrations started. Peter Gilham got the ball rolling by pointing out (more than once) that at no point in the season were Brentford in the bottom three (the inference being that Leeds had been). Then Christian Norgaard emerged from the tunnel carrying his small child. He had been voted player of the season but hadn’t played today through injury. An amusing moment when he was caught saying ‘Fuck’ when he thought his microphone wasn’t working. But Thomas Frank made it alright, when he started his mini-speech with “This place is fucking rock and roll!” At this point the players and staff and their families came out for the lap of appreciation.

Signing-off

In the past, in the Championship and before that in Leagues 1 & 2, we have always gone to as many home games as possible but selective about which away games we attend. This season we attempted to go to every single game, home and away, and very nearly succeeded. You have to take your hat off to those fans who do succeed, and who do so season in season out. They are a breed apart.

Obviously, in all leagues, not just the Premier League, there are some teams that are better than others. But attending so many games one after the other reinforces that awareness of fine margins, close calls, lucky escapes and wrong decisions all totting up. A differentiator.

It’s hard to believe this special season has ended. And with Brentford finishing in 13th pace to boot.

Bees are staying up! I said Bees are staying up!

Brentford FC in the Premier League 2021/22 – episode 6

December’s games – thick and fast

Tottenham Hotspur 2 Brentford 0 – Thursday 2 December

‘Spurs fan?’ asked security outside the Blue Coats pub near the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium. ‘No.’ But he let us in anyway. Inside it was loud and friendly, and the service well organised and super-efficient. The positivity and optimism of these fans confounded my abiding memory of the Spurs fan I worked with in the 1990s. He wore a replica shirt to work on every shift, and even when they won was oh so glum, ‘We’ll probably lose next week.’

White Hart Lane has long been a distant memory of a couple of visits many years ago. This was my first time at the new stadium, and… it’s amazing. Big, bright, spacious. At most grounds, programme sellers are cash-only, even now. Here, they’re contactless-only.

Light show like something out of Close Encounters.

Waiting on the concourse involved playing our little game of managerial merry-go-round guess who’s the opposition manager this week. And of course, this evening it’s much-travelled heart-throb Antonio Conte. We also enjoyed a mega sausage roll and a pint or two. At our seats the pre-match light show was worthy of Glastonbury.

The stadium has a capacity of 62,850, including an away fan allocation of around 3,000. The attendance was 54,202. I wonder how many were Brentford. A glance at the match day programme; nice and glossy with a couple of almost-amusing caption errors under Sergi Canos’s photo.

My sheltered upbringing means I’ve never heard of the Spanish position, nor have I ever met someone who was Forward.

Tottenham cruised much of the game; they looked like they could’ve stepped up a gear had they needed to. Son Heung-Min was the stand-out player. So quick and skilful. He got an assist for Sergi Canos’s own goal on 12 minutes and scored one himself on 65 minutes. He also took all the corners, bouncing the ball like a tennis player before placing it on the corner quadrant.

It was a philosophical trudge that we made to Wood Green tube in the cold night air.

Leeds United 2 Brentford 2 – Saturday 4 December

We arrived in Leeds the night before the game, to be greeted by cold, wind and rain. Revisiting the Leeds side streets that we slipped down in our student days. Back streets and back alley pubs, some cash-only with no music, TV or wifi. Myriad Asian restaurants, many of them very good (we’ve been here before in the Championship).

We chatted about the game in prospect as we walked along the River Aire and through the railway station hinterland, then followed the hordes down to Holbeck and across the motorway footbridge to Elland Road.

Ex-Bees Stuart Dallas and Adam Forshaw are here. The popular Toumani Diagouraga, aka ‘Toums’, or even ‘Dave’ to some, left Brentford for Leeds in 2016, and is now at Morecombe. And of course our very own Pontus Janson came to Brentford from Leeds. The club have recovered well from the dark days of 2007/10 when they were down and nearly out in League 1.

The pre-match entertainment didn’t dampen our spirits.

Triangle man is sitting in front of us, blowing up red balloons and launching them above the frozen breath of the crowd. At home games he rings a triangle whenever Brentford get a corner. Been doing it for years and was one of the first Bees fans we ever met. On six minutes there was applause for Arthur Labinjo-Hughes, the child abused and killed by his father and his father’s partner who have just been sentenced. So sad and really puts things in perspective.

The match day programme is the smallest I’ve seen, but not in a bad way – it’s more pocket friendly in size. Each of the articles in the early section (the important ones that don’t usually tell you much) are signed off ‘Marching on together’, which seems to be a common theme in the signage.

On the pitch though, Leeds were marching decidedly out of step. They scored first, then we got two. As we reminded them to the tune of “Love Will Tear Us Apart”, ‘Leeds, Leeds are falling apart, again.’

‘Scoreboard, scoreboard, tell us the score!’

We were playing much better than in the previous few games. But Leeds nicked an equaliser in 90+5. From a corner at which Alvaro looked dazed and unsteady following a collision. Didn’t that happen at Spurs, too? The ground has a capacity of nearly 38,000. The attendance was 35,639. Some Leeds fans were chanting that we hadn’t sold all of our allocation.

Leeds were happy to save it at the end. We were disappointed but OK with the result. As we left the ground and into the dark streets, some Leeds fans were growling abuse at anyone in Bees colours, including youngsters. We later read that objects had been thrown at Sergi Canos and Bryan Mbeumo. This is certainly not Newcastle.

Brentford 2 Watford 1 – Friday 10 December

We usually do well on a Friday. On the way to the ground we span the wheel of managerial merry-go-round guess who’s the opposition manager – it’s Claudio Ranieri! Stand out players are Cleverley and Sissoko. Tinkerman meets Little and Large?

As usual, the cardboard portal to Premier League survival was assembled before the start of the game. Five minutes later it was dismantled.

Watford were in yellow shirts with thin black hoops. All the players took the knee and the fans applauded. We started well. Lots of possession. Winning the ball back well in midfield. Janelt safe and steady playing at left centreback. ‘He comes from Germany…’

Then Watford scored. A recurring nightmare as yellow flare smoke came wafting along the stand from the away section and our play became disjointed. Just like the Norwich game. Triangle man responded by blowing up red balloons again and punching them into the cold night air.

Watford goalie trying to put Bryan off by the penalty spot.

We got two late on to win the game. A Pontus header on 84. A Bryan penalty on 90+5. Watford were stunned, Hornets stung by Bees.

Brentford v Manchester United – Tuesday 14 December

There could be no better time to play United, a club in transition following the sacking of Solskjaer, and the immediate departure of caretaker Michael Carrick after his final game. Rangnick’s got his work cut out with an unsettled squad.

We’ve even done the Covid vaccination pass stuff. But no, the game was postponed due to cases of Covid in the United camp. B***er. Surprised to learn that top-level players at some clubs haven’t been vaccinated. Whatever the rights and wrongs, you’d have thought the big clubs would have insisted on it, when they control so much else of their players’ lives.

Southampton v Brentford – Saturday 18 December

Postponed, this time because of cases of Covid in the Brentford camp. Thomas Frank is among those calling for all games to be called off until the situation is resolved. That won’t happen.

Brentford 0 Chelsea 2 (EFL Cup Quarter Final) – Tuesday 21 December

A 7.45pm kick-off, and we arrived earlier than usual for the Covid pass checks now being introduced at all grounds. Some fans were even wearing masks, which may explain why the singing was a bit muted.

Brentford were inflicted with an unfair yellow on 11 minutes which left many bemoaning the favour referees appear to give the elite clubs. I’m not sure how true that is, but it certainly set the tone for subsequent decisions.

Chelsea dominated possession in the first half with their lovely, precise passing. But we had the best chances. Half-time entertainment came in the form of the Brentford subs (probably unwittingly) skipping and high-kicking in time to Wham’s “Last Christmas”.

In the second half Chelsea turned up the heat and brought on Jorginho and Pulisic. Ghoddos came on for Henry on 73 minutes, a decision that mystified some fellow-fans. On 74 minutes the ball was cleared, looping out of play and down into the stairway exit near our section of the North Stand. We cheered as though we’d scored. Not long after, Chelsea brought on the biggest gun, N’Golo Kanté, who immediately controlled the midfield. Ominous. His pass to Reece James led to goalmouth confusion and Pontus own-goaled. Five minutes later we conceded a soft penalty.

Chelsea players applaud their fans. Thomas Frank applauds ours.

We played well but Chelsea deserved to win. Roll on the old cliché about concentrating on the league and isn’t the FA Cup a bigger deal anyway?

Brighton 2 Brentford 0 – Sunday 26 December

The first of the return fixtures. An 8.00 pm kick-off on a Boxing Day Sunday with no trains running and several other games postponed because of Covid. Brentford fans met the travel challenge admirably, in our case by driving down the day before in unending rain and through many partially flooded roads.

A walk to the sea at Rottingdean during a lull in the drizzle and later a ride on a bus full of Brighton fans to the ground. Its capacity is 30,666 and the gate was 30,141, though many of them must’ve arrived late because the place looked half empty in the first half.

Couldn’t find a programme seller so I ordered one online the next day. It’s pretty good, with an interesting section on Brentford. There’s also a pull-out section-cum-poster on Brighton player Tariq Lamptey. We know manager Graham Potter from his time at Swansea in the Championship. Seems a decent fellow.

Sometimes it felt like we were tilting at windmills like this one on the South Downs.

A more thorough Covid pass check but still no attempt at verification. More masks being worn. A pie and a pint on the concourse. We like the ground and its cushioned seats but there was no sitting down today. After a bright start by Brentford, Trossard scored for Brighton on the counter. Then ex-Bee Neal Maupay got their second with a wonder strike.

It didn’t take Brighton’s fans long to take our ‘Hey Sergi Canos, ooh, ah! I wanna know, how d’ya score that goal!’ song and adapt it to Neal Maupay. A double stab to the heart. The top deck of the bus back to the hotel rang with choruses of ‘Albion! Albion!’

Seagulls entering the portal of imminent victory before the game.

Brighton are the first and probably won’t be the last team to do the double over us this season. They’ve had a bad run of results recently and it wouldn’t surprise me if we were the last team they beat, way back in September.

In the days after this game there was unease on social media about whether our performance suffered because of injuries, tiredness or style of play. We side with those who say this affects most clubs outside the big four, so get behind the team and enjoy this special time come what may.

Brentford 0 Manchester City 1 – Wednesday 29 December

All a bit weird, two days before the game the Premier League announced a record 103 new cases of Covid-19 among Premier League clubs’ staff and players during the previous week. But most games are going ahead nevertheless. The club was doing a more thorough inspection of Covid passes than previously, so much so that mine was rejected and it took some persuading that it was indeed not out of date.

Man City practising before the game. But they don’t really need to.

An 8.15pm kick-off because it was being shown on Amazon. The camera operator scuttled away from the centre spot and only just made it to the touchline before kick-off. What’s that all about?

City played in light blue. It was a nice change for an away team to play in a strip other than yellow, especially when Brentford’s away kit is also yellow. Whatever happened to that lovely away kit from last season (or maybe the one before) – dark grey with orange/red socks?

The game? Oh, yeah. Well we were brilliant. One of the best performances I’ve seen from Brentford, though I am starting to think there’s a grain of truth in the referees never book stars allegation. Champions and table toppers City got away with a good few bits of naughtiness.

City’s goal came from a De Bruyne pass that was so perfect you hardly noticed Foden guide it into the net.

Next time…

Well, that was some sleigh ride together for two, too. And we go again on Sunday with the second of the return fixtures, at home to Villa. Mercifully, there are just three league games and one FA Cup game in January, unless the Premier League decides to shoe-horn in some rearranged fixtures.

Stop press, the Premier League has just decided to shoe-horn in the postponed game at Southampton a few days after Port Vale.

Happy New Year!